.....strength.....

Not much different going on around here. I am still being deprived of any sleep...but he is worth it. Eli has been making it out and about the last few days too! He has even made it to his first basketball game!!!! (2.5 weeks old! Payton was 5 days old at her first game..ha!) Last night he went to my parents house for the first time too! Today I took him to Zachs work so all of his co-workers could meet him, and then we made a pit stop by Zachs moms office so all of her co workers could meet Eli too! :) Everyone loved him!!
He is still growing and filling out...but still he is so tiny! :) Here are a few new pictures :) We just love staring at him!














I am doing alright. Lots of emotions still.
I was thinking the other day about how much I have been through in the last year. I am proud of myself....and of Zach and I for how far we have come. But I especially have been thinking about Eli....my (our) little miracle baby.
First of all, they told me I would probably never have babies without help of fertility treatments, because of my PCOS (Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome...google it ::smiles::). And secondly, I was on the pill to try to regulate my crazy system...and for some reason God decided to give me a chance. It wasn't the fairy tale story...I always dreamt that I would be married and all that jazz..but whatever, I guess I have never been one to follow the "rules." So I get pregnant, and during my pregnancy I had a few bumps, but nothing tooo major. God gave us a son. That was such an awesome day to find out it was a boy. :Things continued to go pretty smoothly: I was only in labor for 4 hours. And for a first pregnancy, I hear thats just crazy short. It was painful...but Eli was so worth it. Then they give me this little boy, I cried everytime I looked at him, everytime I thought of him, and everytime that someone took him from me and I didnt get to hold him for a long period of time....then came more heartache. The Jaundice. And you all know what we went through with the NICU and all of that yucky business...so I'll spare you the repeat of that. But it felt as though "something" was trying to keep our son away from us...on so many levels. It is amazing to feel so overwhelmed with emotions....of joy...now that he is here, alive...and so healthy. It is awesome, and he makes me so happy everyday (even when he is screaming and I have no idea what is wrong with him. hehe). Someone said to me yesterday...God will give you strength you never knew you had. And that is the most true statement ever. . .when it came to hope, when it came to my pregnancy, labor, the NICU, and waking up ever 3 hours in the middle of the night to nourish this little man. Life is crazy...but oh so good :)

xoxo
Tay